The Mother Dimension

There is the earth and sky, water and wind, and all other manner of forces that bind us together. Then, there is another dimension which can only be described as the Mother Dimension. If you have a mother or are a mother, you know what I mean. (This should include all of you, unless there’s something you need to share about which planet you’re from?)

I will attempt to define this portion of our being, this suspension between and above all other physical laws. It is indeed a place that has power over us like nothing can. Wherever we are on its bandwidth, either young or old, we are most likely experiencing angst or confusion or pressure about the fact that MOTHER is a very complicated word.

We begin by sharing the body, the fluid, the emotion and soul’s energy of our mothers, as we grow from the miracle of cells bathed in warm, life giving liquid, to that of a girl born into a world of cold, light and noise. We are tethered to our mother’s hopes, her fears, her courage and the pain of birth. We fight with her, cling to her, bargain with her and protect her, and yet we also flee from her. It is with one look or casual word from her, which either brings back the demons of a childhood gone awry or an adolescence nurtured through wisdom and patience. Let’s be honest, we have all experienced both.

We look at the outline of her face, tracing curiously a jaw line, a handprint, or a slumped shoulder that resembles our own to find meaning in our own biology. In a way, it is the closest of relationships and yet the one that must be severed in order to become individuals. The insidious poison inherent in apron strings once severed, can feed our maturity. Yet when we have children of our own, we reconnect ourselves to the Mother Dimension putting us on another course of mystery.

This is a heavy way to define mothers, but I find that all of the poetic quotes, stories and bouquets that flow in and around us this time of year, do not describe the intensity with which we manage and balance our life with and as mothers. It is a subject that we must explore and resolve, celebrate and repent from and use to build a lifeline with our inner selves. It is the key to resolving who we want to be and who we may have already become.

On May 26th,Networking, Women and Wine will sponsor and share some ideas about how to , 1. Survive being a mother, 2. Survive having a mother and 3. Reconciling the two. We will do it over a glass of wine, a hug and a smile, a gathering of women nurturing each other’s noble traits. JOIN US!

If you feel like everyone wants a little piece of you, read on.

It's true. Those little candy hearts know the real story. They have short, sweet, concise messages that get misunderstood by young and old alike.

Think about 4th grade: You plop the candy in an envelope, pass it back to the row behind you and soon Billy Smith is reading -YOU'RE CUTE!- and you're toast!

Seems today it's even harder to say the right things to the right people. Valentine's or not, we're all over stimulated and under motivated and giving "love" just feels like one more chore.

You are overwhelmed because you cannot find within yourself the wellspring of more to give because you are empty. You have not refilled the vessel because, in reality you do not no how to truly care for yourself. Carl Jung said, "The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely." In that is all the western truth of our gender. We have been trained to see ourselves as broken and un-whole. We have found fault in all our failures instead of experience. We have found ugliness in our wrinkles instead of wisdom. And we have found weakness in our tears instead of compassion.

On February 10th, we will explore these subjects, and share some new ideas with you that you can explore, to help increase your ability to love yourself. In essence we will help you fill your own vessel in a balanced, loving and nurturing way. As Mae West said so blatantly, "I don't like myself, I'm crazy about myself!"

Well, maybe there's a place in-between for all of us noble women.